The Tri-County Journal
& Chattahoochee Chronicle
PO Box 850, 71 Webb Lane
Buena Vista, GA 31803
229-649-6397
tjournal@alltel.net

  This year for the first time my son Drew, 4, personally selected my gift for Father's Day. He told me so a couple of days in advance, noting that he and "Mommy" had already bought the gift several weeks before while on vacation at the beach.
   I didn't know what to expect, but with him doing the "picking" I figured I'd at least have something a little more unique than the stereotypical tie or bottle of Brut by Faberge. Because I knew the location of the purchase, my guesses included a plastic shovel with pail and a box of seashells.
   My guesses were nowhere near the mark, but I was definitely right on the "unique" part.
   My gift was a watch.
   "What's so unique about a watch?" you may be asking.
   Let's just say it's no ordinary watch. Other than that I really shouldn't go into details, as not to divulge any information that could give the Legion of Doom a leg up in its quest to conquer the universe.
   Okay, since you're a faithful and trustworthy reader of your hometown newspaper, I guess I can let you in on the secret. ... It's a Batman watch. That fact was obvious from the moment I saw it, but I could hardly believe my good luck when my son informed me that it is a "REAL" Batman watch.
   In addition to the normal faceplate with numbers that indicate the time, the watch also has an outer dial with seemingly random numbers printed on it. But the numbers aren't random at all. No, they were carefully chosen so that when the wearer turns the dial to the right he is transformed into Batman. A quick turn of the dial back to the left and the wearer becomes Bruce Wayne (for the super hero impaired, Bruce Wayne is Batman's alter-ego - the CEO of Wayne Enterprises, which financed the Justice League's watchtower in space and keeps the super friends up-to-date with all the latest crime fighting gizmos).
    We had a lot of fun with my watch (my son already had a Superman watch, so we quickly formed our own dynamic duo), until I asked what I had to do to turn back into "Daddy." Alas, there is no Daddy setting on the watch. After almost collapsing from crime-fighting fatigue, I finally found a loophole by simply taking the watch off.
   While thinking about receiving a Batman watch at the age of 36, I wondered what sort of other unique Father's Day gifts have been received by Dads down through the ages. I'm talking about gifts that are funny in and of themselves, but downright hilarious when one stops to think that the gift-giver actually thought this was what the grown man would want. The entertainment is even better when you think of how the Dads (at least the good ones) pretended that the gift was even better than they could have imagined.
   I remember giving my Dad a catcher's mitt once many years ago. I recall him being excited and saying that he couldn't wait to use it. Of course, now I can realize that he probably wasn't altogether thrilled with my choice. But he never told me. He just squatted down behind a homemade home plate as I tossed pitch after pitch from an imaginary pitcher's mound in the front yard. In hindsight, I was the one who received the gift - a Dad who would use the mitt each time the request was made, thinking of how much it meant to his son rather than concentrating on his knees popping or his back aching.
   I hope my son's recent pick of a present means that in at least some way I am letting him know what my Dad always found a way to let me know: You're important to me and what's important to you is important to me.
   I'll sign off for now, but I'll see you again soon - same Batpaper, same Batpage.